Monday, March 16, 2015

Soulless Avatars of Beauty

Soulless Avatars of Beauty, Beautiful People, Prejudice, Karfelt
S. R. Karfelt/The Glitter Globe

Pretty much all of my life I've dismissed beautiful men. You know that old theory that if someone is truly beautiful they're simply TOO BUSY being beautiful to have any time to devote to being interesting? That.


It's not true either. I have a DF who is drop dead gorgeous and a blast and a half. I used to tell her she must have been an ugly child and had spare time to develop a personality. She assures me she's always been killer-beautiful even in the womb as a zygote. Which just makes me LOL that much more. See what I mean though? A sense of humor is a definite sign of an interesting personality.


So my Dear Friend basically blows my theory out of the water. Yet a small part of me still believes it. But I try to temper my stereotype with a .005 second Glance of Assessment to check out the beautiful person's attitude before determining whether or not there is a likelihood of personality. If I find a personality AND beauty I am awed. If not, I drive on by.


So, yeah. We all have our prejudices. This is mine.


In my defense I'm unfailingly polite when I interact with beautiful people, even though I've likely completely dismissed them as being soulless avatars of beauty.


How does one develop this prejudice? I would argue that one pays attention. The sun rises and sets every day you start to expect stuff. It’s partly our fault. We as a species spoil beautiful people instead of treating them as equals. You know it’s true. I know a beautiful woman who vomited on a guy at a rock concert. He ASKED HER OUT. Not to discount my own Effing Swan, but I’m pretty sure I’d have gotten punched out. Let’s not talk about the time she took her car in for an oil change and they pin-striped it for free.


Human beings are drawn to beauty and to beautiful Human Beings, I’m sure it’s an evolutionary trait. Ever notice how Olympians are always beautiful? It’s a sign of good health and genes I’m sure. You glance and some part of you bellows Hey, boy! Wanna share those beautiful healthy genes? That’s how I met my husband. I went after those swimmer abs like a high-powered magnet. Nah, I’m kidding. I like smart guys. Well, smart guys with swimmer abs.


S. R. Karfelt

Do you share this prejudice? Do you ever feel guilty about it? I have to admit that when I hang with my Super-Model-Looking-Dear-Friend that the way other women treat her gets old. But what I’d really like to know is, what do you think would happen to you if you barfed on some dude at a rock concert? And have you ever known someone who could get away with it?


  1. I once took a plane trip to California with my goddess-like fairy blood friend. All eyes were drawn to her. (All eyes, men, women and children.) Everywhere we went people stared. I actually saw one man carrying a briefcase and in a suit and tie run into a pillar because he was staring at her. Every time she posts a new selfie I gasp. She could vomit anywhere and people of any gender would rush to her aid. The best thing is she is beautiful inside and out. Anytime I have contact with her I come away feeling more beautiful myself.

  2. ^That is the highest tribute I can imagine. As dear as my Super-Model-Looking friend is, she's totally on her on when she starts vomiting.

  3. If I hurled on anybody I'd likely die of embarrassment before even seeing their reaction. I'm not sure I share that one. I do notice that my negative self image sometimes rubs off on my views of others that share traits I don't like in myself.

  4. ^Since this theory would make me a beautiful man, we'll have to opt for another in my case. ;)

    Although, Ashley, I'd probably die of embarrassment too. Either that or from getting punched out. One or the other for sure!

  5. I've read this a few times trying to think of something appropriate to say. I'm at a loss. I appreciate beauty. Do I have this prejudice though? I don't really "see" people on the outside. I see their heart and soul more than anything. Even at first glance I don't have that immediate "so smexy" or "eww did they beat ya with an ugly stick" reaction. Even those "beautiful" men from the tv... I love them because they have beautiful souls, sense of humors, etc... a pretty face is just like frosting on a cake to me. LOL

  6. I don't really drink that often so the chances of me puking are slim to none. But yes...the beautiful people. That song is now whirling through my head as I type this. Honestly, I have seen them. I have heard they exist, but aren't they a rumor akin to Elvis still being alive?

    I really don't notice them because they are under my radar. I am just instantly drawn to anything that isn't beautiful because that is where real beauty lies. Within.

  7. Hi Joni! Is it the Beautiful People from Burlesque? I'm assuming it's out of your head now, because it's hopped into mine.

    Please. Take it back.

    I saw Elvis in Vegas last month. It wasn't pretty. I don't really drink either, but I saw several of him in various stages of decay and dress pretty much any time I left my hotel room.

    My point is apparently he does exist in some fashion. Just like beautiful people. They're real. Go look in the mirror you Effing Swan.