Sunday, September 16, 2012

Perspective Diet

Today I was in the kitchen mixing up a spinach smoothie for lunch. My buddy Zeus had stopped by for an impromptu visit. Since I am the world’s worst part-time vegetarian, I’d fried him up a pound of bacon. Giants really like bacon. If you have a giant in your life, it is a good idea to keep some bacon on hand. He ate the bacon and watched me toss almond milk, yogurt, banana, fresh spinach and then a spoon of peanut butter into the blender. He asked, shouted really, because the blender is super loud, “Do you just look through the kitchen and toss anything in there?” “Yes,” I bellowed in reply – even though I’d shut the blender off now, “isn’t that how cooking is done?”  Zeus never thinks my jokes are funny, but I don’t let that stop me.
Peanut butter and bananas are two of my most unfavorite foods ever. Despite that I eat them both when I’m trying to make my jeans fit. Now that summer is over it won’t be possible to keep wearing my stretchy shorts everywhere. Sadly I got sick this summer. Do you gain weight when you’re sick?  If you stop running all the time and sit around and write for a living you do. Also if you subsist on a diet of mostly crackers, orange juice and a trunk load of Luden cough drops you do. Fine. Maybe there were a dozen or so large bars of Lindt dark chocolate (with a hint of sea salt) involved. If this has happened to you too, all that matters is if you do manage to get your jeans buttoned, you can’t bend or sit in them. That means it is time to fight back, and not with new jeans, though that is a good idea too.

The Perspective Diet is my weapon of choice. I’ve been down this road before, so I know what healthy foods to stock up on, no worries there. I can subsist happily on granola and spinach smoothies almost indefinitely. I’d rather write than anything, and the trick is to keep my cupboards well stocked with fresh healthy foods. The problem comes in, usually in the evenings when I’m stuck on a scene I’m writing, and somebody walks past with a bowl of ice cream. The law frowns on tackling a young child and sucking down his entire bowl of chocolate chip ice-cream, even if you do apologize after and put nice sparkly band-aids on any boo-boos. The latter probably wouldn’t happen anyway, forget the sparkly band-aids I’d probably be in the kitchen getting a refill on that ice-cream. Don’t judge!  Have you only eaten liquid spinach all week?  It’s not only vampires that get hungry and fall off the wagon you know.

So this is how the Perspective Diet works. You stock the house up with plenty of junk that you don’t like. I hope you’re a picky eater, this works much better if you are. I buy things that I’d never eat. My house is stocked up with plenty of ice-cream and prefab cookies in those flavors I really dislike. Children can now roam the corridors safely at night with their treats. This takes effort, and you must take care to shop for these unpleasant treats while you are at your strongest. Do not stray into the dark chocolate aisle. Do not go into a bakery. Do not go out to eat anywhere unless it involves Vegan or Sushi – and eventually you’ll be able to get those jeans on again without a wrestling match. To me it is all a matter of perspective. If I fill my life up with foods that make me feel good and move faster, and shun that which doesn’t, I get far better rewards than comfy jeans. Unfortunately my family claims the Perspective Diet has sinister motives. The world is just chalk full of conspiracy theories, isn’t it?  They claim that I’m fattening them up, so that I simply appear thinner. Now who would do such a thing? Besides, they’re more than welcome to a spinach smoothie anytime they like.

What is your perspective on diets in general?  And how do you feel about spinach smoothies?  I’m sharing my recipe with you, and if you think it sounds gross, I double Slinky-Dog DARE you do try one and report back.
Spinach Smoothie
1 Cup of Milk (or Almond Milk)
¼ - ½ Cup of plain Yogurt
1 Frozen Banana
1 Tablespoon of Peanut Butter (Natural is better, but it’s your smoothie)
2-4 Cups of fresh Spinach

Toss everything into a regular blender (yes, it will actually liquefy the spinach just fine). A few ice-cubes if you want to make the concoction more of a smoothie consistency.
Don’t forget the straw. Then come tell me how good it was, because it really is yummy.

Speaking of yummy treats, Slinky Dogs have no trouble slipping on their jeans. The Epic Slinky Dog giveaway continues here at The Glitter Globe. Please follow my blog, if you haven’t already. Right over there ---à where it says “Join this site” (or Networked Blogs). And be sure to leave a comment below, for a chance at your very own Slinky Dog! For every five new followers, a random name is picked from the comment section. Remember to check back to see if you’ve won, I will post winners here, and attempt to locate you. If I can’t contact you, or don’t hear back within a week, I will draw another name.
Photo Credit:  Stephanie Karfelt

*Photo Credit:  Stephanie Karfelt


  1. Stephanie - Great post and perspective. And good for you in keeping healthy. Like you, I have felt so much better since I cut out animal products from my diet (with exception of occasional cheese). The vegan lifestyle is quite good for us, isn't it?


  2. Western eating habits are a strange thing. When I was in the middle east, the folks there stayed with their staple diet and didn't have any qualms about it. In fact, offering them anything different usually resulted in a "what, and poison myself with your Western crap?" We simply value our eating to the point of fearing being hungry. Not starving mind you, but simply hungry. We've started a new perspective at our house, which means we went nuclear on the pantry and fridge- if it had an ingredient that sounded more chemistry than food, out it went. It's been tougher than I thought, but like you said, it's about making choices instead of succumbing to habits.

  3. Shanna - I consider myself the worst vegetarian ever, and I cheat on vegan with cheese quite often. But, yes, it is amazing how much better I feel.
    Blessing to you too - and you are entered for a Slinky Dog. Good luck!

  4. Rob, Couldn't agree more! Hungry is one thing, empty another, it is actually a rather pleasant feeling. Good luck at your house. Keeping the junk outside seems key for me. (And I agree that some processed food is akin to slow poison.)
    And some of my followers are now building Slinky Dog collections, so you're in the running, everytime you post! How many kids do you have? Or aren't you sharing?

  5. I have 5 kids, 4 in the house, 1 in heaven, so I'll keep posting for sure! :) Yeah, I've kept Slinky 1 hidden for the time being. Not necessarily on purpose, I just have a ton of crap on my desk. LOL

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  7. The trick is finding good food I like, but I found that I started eating healthier after I started buying my own groceries.
    Considering that my body has begun to rebel at all things grease laden (aside from pizza - that's not going anywhere), it's not too hard to eat better. The alternative is a very bad gut ache.
    Also helps that too much dark chocolate gives me a headache. I'm not as likely to overindulge.

  8. Rob - Of course The Glitter Globe is just neat and organized O.o in my imagination. In the real world I'm wondering where the heck the fruit flies are coming from.
    Five kids! You'll have to post a whole lot. I'll bet there are already Slinky Dogs in heaven. I drew your name again today! Yay Rob. PM your address, because I'm not organized enough to find it again.

  9. Dear Heretic - Pain is a huge motivator isn't it? :(
    Very sorry about the dark chocolate limits. It is a sadness.
    What is your favorite dark chocolate? I'm into the 86 proof hardcore stuff myself. With sea salt. In moderation, of course. Life is good.

  10. Shanna - You won a Slinky Dog, yay you! PM an address and I'll send it out later this week.

  11. *******
    Okay, two Slinky Dogs awarded today celebrating ten new blog followers! Yay! To Shanna Groves and Rob Holliday.
    Keep posting if you haven't won yet! I toss your name in with every comment. Will keep playing this game until I completely run out of Slinky Dogs - and two new herds just arrived, so we're all good folks!

  12. Y'know what? I'm not sure i want to keep following you, Stephanie; you keep on talking rubbish about healthy food and stuff. Look, if god hadn't intended us to eat dried whey, cocoa butter, or glucose syrup he wouldn't have made chocolate taste so good. I mean, you can tell you're not supposed to eat spinach ~ there's a reason it tastes that way!

  13. By the way, i've got sunflower seed sourdough going in the oven in five minutes, soon as it's heated sufficiently; wish i could share!

  14. I braved it and tried your smoothie recipe since your pictures always make me want to try them. Once you get over the fact that it's spinach and bananas mixed together, it's not that bad. Definitely not something I could have every day though. I couldn't do it. I also don't think I could ever be a vegetarian. I love bacon to much :p

  15. Don't worry, Elsie, I'm sitting here eating dark chocolate as I work. There's a rumor that it's healthy, you know, and that's scientific enough. TRY the spinach smoothie you big baby, and then gripe at me.
    (The bread sounds divine by the way!)

  16. Miriam! You tried the smoothie! I'm so proud of you. Not bad...hmmm...good enough. I really do like them. Of course I understand the whole bacon thing, it's just patriotic. You could always try the part-time vegetarian thing.
    Okay, I've been wanting to try this - I hope you check back on the comments, Miriam. If so hurry up and enter this number into your Apple account. It's the number for a $10 iTunes gift card. But whoever actually reads the comment section can claim it! I'll probably pop it into Apple myself in a month or so if no one comments on it. So ha. Hopefully it won't be wasted on Country Music - but it will work just fine on that I'm sure. Here we go:
    And enjoy whoever uses it. I'm just in a mood to surprise someone.

  17. Perspective...I am a TERRIBLY PICKY eater. I like nothing. It's not hard for me to turn down a sweet I don't like.
    However, there are things called 'carbs'...and I love them.

    My fun little diet ploys have been to cut things out just to prove I can. I don't eat fries on weekdays. Funny thing now is unless it's a legit restaurant fry...I don't like fries anymore.

    That's how I play. I cut something out to prove I can, and it ends up on the picky list.

    But don't you dare take away my Bugles. They are here to stay...especially during wedding season.