Sunday, August 21, 2011

Run-On Sentences Freakin ROCK

I’ve heard, from obviously biased sources, that I need to work on my run-on sentences; I do not understand this, my run-on sentences are amazing - I luv the dudes - I could pick them up and kiss them, as a matter of fact I tend to examine them closely, if they’re extra nice, I feed them a pile of commas and if they’re really special they might get a colon or even a semi-colon (oh yeah) we all know Jane Austen never married because once Mr. Darcy entered her universe there was no hope for mere mortals – how many women walk this earth today – nearly two hundred years later – who not only are secretly in love with Mr. Darcy, but who would seriously consider leaving their husbands should he happen by (my husband and I have an understanding about this and he is secure with it, he’s all about statistics and feels safe in his math – where I’m all about sparkly possibility and in The Glitter Globe anything is possible, so let’s just say I’m keeping my options open when it comes to Mr. Darcy); no writer seems to deign to create an antagonist the likes of him – we know when to leave perfection alone – but this writer has a hot thing going for run on sentences and it is my goal in life to create the perfect one. 


  1. Have you read much Faulkner? I only ask because he is the king of all contained in a sentence ~ it was his goal, i believe, as a manner of showing the way that all things are connected ~ only in his case they were perfectly formed, if difficult for mere mortals such as myself to follow and understand, and not run on which, as i understand it, is actually a fault in a sentence.

  2. My Dear Elsie ~ You are perhaps familiar with the old adage, "One man's fault is another man's glitter" ~ I must admit, shamefacedly, that I have not read Faulkner; but I will correct this gaping hole in my education soon since you dangle the bait of immortal, perfectly formed, non-run on yet all-containing sentences that I simply cannot resist.

  3. In case you were wondering, this is not the perfect run-on sentence. Sincerely, your biggest crit- I mean, fan. Your biggest fan. xo

  4. Dear Anonymous/Biggest Critic - It is a WIP, you know, and each run-on sentence brings me closer and closer to perfection, I am sure you would agree that it is without a doubt close to perfection simply because it involves the words "Mr. Darcy" in it, and the photograph too, doesn't hurt matters - though, and I hope it isn't true that you are a fan of the "Other Mr. Darcy" the non-A&E version one that would really cause you to lose all credibility IMHO.


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